What to do if you are not in the mood to make love to your husband

Great lovemaking between two people that truly care about each other can definitely make life’s frustrations a little bit easier, not to mention bring you both closer mentally and physically. With a little planning and some imagination, passion can actually grow throughout your marriage, as opposed to dwindling, like what happens to many married couples.

A person cannot have great sex unless they are true to themselves and honest with their partner. Yet still, despite great strides, one old adage always stays the same: Women need love to get in the mood for sex, while men need sex to be receptive to love. The key for women to be able to enjoy making love at all times is honesty; honesty about how they feel, when they do not want to make love, and being able to tell their husband why.

Below are four Don’ts when it comes to choosing whether or not to make love to your husband:

1. Do not consistently make love if you aren’t physically ready to. By doing so over and over again just because you feel that you must, or that it is your duty, or because time is short, can only breed resentment. This will do nothing more than erode any good feelings that you have for each other. Instead of giving in, explain to your husband that you are thrilled to know he desires you, and suggest a better time to make love, and one when you are physically in the mood.

2. Do not criticize your husband for trying something new that does not work. Men enjoy variety and it can be hard enough just to introduce something new into the love-making routine, so do not shatter his confidence by criticizing something new that you were not pleased about during sex.

3. Do not have sex when your mind is not with your husband. In other words, choose a better time to make love if you cannot get your daily problems out of your head. Are you thinking about your child’s bad grades on his report card? Did you bounce a check by accident? Did you have a bad day at the office? If these troubles are filling your mind when your hubby wants to make love, then be open with him, explain how you feel, and pick a better time. He will appreciate your honesty about how you really are feeling.

4. Do not use your fear or resentment as a tool or weapon and avoid sex. If there are problems that are bothering you that exist outside of the bedroom with your husband, then find a way to talk about it. What is really bothering you? What would you like to say to him instead of giving in to love-making when you aren’t in the mood?

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